If you don’t face this now, six months from today you’ll still be covering your arms and wondering why nothing’s changed. The truth? It’s not a lack of motivation — it’s your resistance to discomfort. This episode is the shift you have to make if you want real, lasting results.
Hey everyone! Welcome to The Arm Coach podcast, episode 78!
It’s a fresh Tuesday. Maybe you’ve been thinking, “Okay, this is it. This week I’m going to get serious. I want to feel better in my skin. I want to feel strong in my arms. I’m done hiding.”
If you’ve had that thought — even quietly, even if you don’t fully believe it yet — I want you to know: you’re not alone.
And I want to talk to you about something that no one really prepares you for when you decide to make a change like this.
It’s not the workout plan. It’s not what you eat.
It’s discomfort.
Discomfort is the real reason most women don’t follow through. It sneaks in quietly. You think:
“I’m too tired.”
“I’m too old to start this now.”
“This isn’t working fast enough.”
“I’ll just try again next week.”
That resistance you feel? That’s discomfort. And I used to believe it was a sign to stop. I thought something had gone wrong every time things felt hard. I just wanted things to feel easy — and honestly, I thought they should feel easy. But avoiding discomfort is exactly what kept me stuck.
Here’s the truth:
If you want toned arms, if you want to feel proud of how you show up — you have to learn to stop resisting discomfort and start working with it.
That shift changed everything for me.
And it can change everything for you too.
Because when you stop thinking discomfort is the enemy — and start seeing it as part of the process — you stop quitting.
You start building trust.
And that’s what creates change that lasts.
Now listen, this whole idea of discomfort?
It applies to every kind of change — but it’s especially true when it comes to your body.
Because here’s what I see all the time:
You have a moment at the end of the day where everything feels heavy. The stress, the busyness, the emotions you didn’t have time to process. And instead of checking in with yourself, instead of doing the rep, the walk, the stretch… you reach for the thing that brings relief.
Maybe it’s food.
Maybe it’s scrolling.
Maybe it’s sitting on the couch and telling yourself, “I’ll start again tomorrow.”
But what you’re really doing in that moment?
You’re trying to escape how you feel.
You’re trying to take the edge off your own discomfort.
Just like someone might use wine or a cocktail to numb out, you’re reaching for something to take the edge off that restless, uncomfortable moment.
And here’s the truth that changed everything for me:
Those small “escapes”? They don’t actually make things better.
They just delay the change you want.
You might say, “I’m not doing that to avoid discomfort, Kristine. I’m just tired. I want to enjoy my night. I deserve to relax.”
I hear that all the time.
But when I gently ask, “Okay, how would it feel if you didn’t check out? If you didn’t eat the snack, or skip the workout, or scroll past the commitment you made to yourself?”
That’s when the truth shows up.
You’d probably feel a little restless.
Maybe deprived.
Maybe even self-conscious or annoyed.
Maybe like you were missing out on something.
That’s all discomfort.
So even if it starts with “I just want to enjoy myself” — underneath it, you're still avoiding something that feels uncomfortable. And I get it. That was me for years.
But here’s what I want you to hear — and this is so important:
Discomfort is not a sign something’s gone wrong. It’s actually proof you’re growing.
We are not here to be comfortable all the time.
We are here to evolve.
To challenge ourselves.
To stretch — literally and emotionally.
You cannot tone your arms or change your relationship with food or build trust in yourself without some discomfort. You just can’t. It’s not optional. It’s part of it.
So what if you stopped seeing discomfort as something to avoid…
and started seeing it as your training ground?
The reps that matter most?
They don’t always happen with weights in your hands.
They happen in the moments when you’re tempted to check out…
but you choose to stay in.
You know, we’ve been talking about the discomfort that comes with growth — showing up for yourself, doing something new, pushing through a workout when it feels easier to quit. That kind of discomfort makes sense to most people. It’s obvious. It’s the stretch, right?
But there’s another kind of discomfort that I don’t think gets talked about enough — and honestly, I think it’s even more painful in the long run.
It’s the discomfort of staying stuck.
Of waking up and realizing… I’ve been saying the same thing for months.
Of noticing that another season’s gone by and I still don’t feel good in my skin.
Of knowing deep down that I’m not where I want to be — not because I can’t get there, but because I keep avoiding the steps it takes.
That’s a different kind of pain.
It’s not loud and dramatic. It’s quiet.
But it lingers. It seeps in over time.
And I want you to hear this, because it’s something I had to learn the hard way:
Staying the same isn’t really staying the same.
It’s slipping backward.
We think if we don’t make a change, we’re just holding steady.
But what’s actually happening is that we’re reinforcing habits that keep us small.
We’re making it easier to keep hiding, easier to break promises to ourselves, easier to believe that change isn’t possible.
And when that happens day after day, week after week, it compounds.
You don’t wake up a year from now as the same version of yourself.
You wake up further from who you want to be.
I talk to women all the time who say, “Well, I’ll probably just be in the same spot in six months.”
And I always pause there, because I don’t actually think that’s true.
You won’t be in the same spot.
You’ll be more tired, more discouraged, more convinced that it’s too late, or too hard, or not worth the effort.
Not because that’s true — but because you’ve been repeating that belief every day without realizing it.
That’s what I mean by slipping backward.
And look, I say this with so much love — truly. I’ve been there.
There were years where I told myself I was just “maintaining,” or “holding steady.”
But what I was really doing was slowly losing trust in myself.
Losing connection with the version of me I wanted to become.
And the hardest part is… it feels so subtle.
You don’t notice it happening, until one day you do.
And it hits you — I don’t want to live like this anymore.
So I just want to offer that today, in case you’re in that in-between space.
The discomfort of change is real, yes — but the discomfort of staying stuck?
That one can steal years from you if you let it.
I want you to really sit with this for a second, because I think it’s something most of us don’t fully realize.
We kind of get that idea of, “Okay, if I don’t make a change, then I’ll probably just stay the same.”
We’ve all said some version of that, right? “If I don’t start working out, if I don’t deal with my food habits, if I don’t take care of my body, I’ll just be exactly where I am six months from now.”
But here’s the part we miss — and it’s kind of a game-changer once you see it:
You’re not staying the same.
You’re actually moving backwards.
Because every time you repeat a choice — whether that’s skipping your workout, avoiding the mirror, hiding your arms, telling yourself “I’ll start Monday” — every single time, you’re reinforcing that habit. You’re strengthening the belief that you can’t do it. You’re making it harder, not easier, to step into the version of you you want to become.
And it’s not just the habit itself that gets stronger — it’s the identity underneath it.
The one that quietly whispers, “This is just who I am now.”
And I say this with so much compassion, because I’ve been there.
For a long time, I told myself I was just stuck in a rut. That I hadn’t really changed. That I was basically the same woman I’d always been, just a little tired, just a little older.
But when I look back, I wasn’t the same.
I had years of patterns behind me that had taken root.
I was showing up with less confidence, less belief, and honestly… less connection to myself.
And that realization? It kind of knocked the wind out of me.
Because what I was really doing — without even meaning to — was hiding from the version of me I wanted to be.
And that came with its own kind of pain.
Which brings me to this:
There are two kinds of discomfort.
There’s the discomfort that moves you forward — and the kind that keeps you small.
The discomfort of growing feels like uncertainty. Like stretching. Like not quite knowing if you’re doing it right, but doing it anyway. It’s nervous energy, self-doubt, awkwardness, a little fear.
But that kind of discomfort means something. It’s proof you’re in motion.
Now compare that to the other kind.
The discomfort of staying stuck? That one feels heavier.
It’s shame. It’s frustration. It’s powerlessness.
It’s that sinking feeling when you realize another week went by and you didn’t follow through — again.
And here’s the thing we forget: they’re both uncomfortable.
You’re already choosing discomfort either way.
So the question becomes: Which kind do you want?
Because one of them pulls you forward, even if it feels a little shaky.
And the other? It just pulls you deeper into the belief that you can’t change.
If I have to feel uncomfortable — and let’s be real, we all do — I’d rather choose the kind that’s building something.
Even if it’s slow. Even if it’s messy.
Even if it’s one tiny rep, one small promise kept, at a time.
Because that’s what grows your arms.
And more importantly? That’s what grows your trust in you.
You know, as I was thinking about this idea of growth versus stagnation, this one memory came rushing back to me — and honestly, I think about it more often than I realize.
It was this one morning when I was walking with a client — we were doing one of those early morning accountability walks where we talk about life while moving our bodies — and she stopped, right in the middle of the sidewalk, and she said, “I feel like everything around me is moving forward… but I’m just standing here. Like I’ve been standing still for years.”
And I’ll never forget that moment. Because she didn’t mean physically standing still. She meant emotionally, mentally, personally. Her kids were growing up. Her friends were getting healthier. Her coworkers were evolving. And she felt like the same version of herself — still covering up her arms, still making the same promises every Monday, still breaking them by Wednesday.
And the thing that struck me most?
She was exhausted from standing still.
Because here’s the truth: it takes energy not to change.
It might sound counterintuitive, but staying in the same spot — especially in a world that’s always moving — is not effortless. It’s draining.
Just like standing in a river with the current pushing against you. You’re not moving forward, but you’re still working hard just to stay upright.
That’s what stagnation feels like.
You wake up, and everything around you is moving — time, seasons, your reflection in the mirror — and you’re using all your energy just to maintain the same stuck spot.
That’s not rest. That’s resistance. And it’s exhausting.
I think a lot of women believe that if they’re not taking action, they’re conserving energy.
But what if the opposite is true?
What if the act of not following through, not moving forward, not stretching into your next version… is what’s wearing you down?
We weren’t meant to stay still.
Not in our bodies. Not in our habits. Not in our dreams.
So if you’ve been wondering why you feel tired or disconnected or frustrated — even though, technically, “nothing’s changed” — maybe that’s exactly why.
Because change isn’t just about movement.
It’s about relief.
And sometimes, the most energizing thing you can do for yourself is stop resisting the flow… and take one small step forward.
So here’s the part that’s really important to understand…
It takes energy to stay stuck.
And it takes energy to grow.
Neither one is free.
You’re going to spend your effort either way — the question is just, where do you want that effort to go?
Do you want to spend it trying to hold yourself in place, trying to keep everything exactly the same, even as your body, your schedule, your life keeps changing?
Or do you want to spend it building something different — something better — even if it’s uncomfortable at first?
Because either way, discomfort is part of the deal. That’s just the truth.
If you choose to grow — to show up, to stretch, to do the work — you’ll feel discomfort.
You’ll feel the pull of old habits. You’ll feel doubt. You’ll wonder if it’s working.
That kind of discomfort comes with momentum.
But if you choose to hide — to check out, to keep doing what you’ve always done — that comes with discomfort too.
It just feels heavier.
More stuck.
More hopeless.
So which one do you want to live with?
Because at the end of the day, discomfort is really just a feeling. A vibration in your body.
And feelings — even the hard ones — are part of the human experience.
We’re not here to avoid all negative emotion.
We’re here to learn from it.
To use it.
To move through it.
If your goal is to feel toned, to feel strong, to feel proud of how you show up in your life — then you’ve got to be willing to feel uncomfortable on purpose.
Not just the discomfort that sneaks up when we’re stuck…
but the kind that comes when we’re chasing something better.
So if you’re listening to this right now — and you’ve been waiting for the perfect time to begin — I want to ask you a few questions.
(And please, don’t just answer these in your head. Get a notebook. Write them down. Let your thoughts land somewhere outside of you.)
Ready?
Where in your life are you trying to stand still?
Where are you resisting change — in your body, in your routines, in the way you talk to yourself?
What discomfort have you been trying to avoid?
Be honest. Is it the feeling of failing again? Being seen? Having to show up when you don’t feel motivated?
And who do you actually want to become?
Not just physically. I’m talking about how you feel when you get dressed. How you move through the day. What kind of woman you’re becoming through this work.
You get to choose.
Not someday.
Not next Monday.
Today.
I think this is one of the biggest things I’ve learned — not just in my own journey, but through years of coaching other women, too:
You really can choose anything.
You can choose to feel stronger.
You can choose to trust yourself.
You can choose to stop hiding and finally show up as the version of you that you’ve been thinking about for years.
But that choice? It comes with discomfort.
So the better question becomes:
What will it take?
What will it take to get where you want to go — and become the woman you want to be?
Why is it worth it to you?
Those are the questions that matter.
Not just “What’s the goal?” but “What’s been in the way?”
And “Am I willing to feel the discomfort it takes to move forward?”
Because so often, we skip that part.
We set the goal — tone up, lose weight, stop emotional eating, wear the tank top — but we don’t pause to look at why we haven’t changed yet.
What have you been avoiding?
What emotion have you been running from?
If you don’t answer those questions honestly, no program, no plan, no workout will ever stick.
But when you do face that discomfort head-on? That’s when things shift.
That’s why I created Arms By Kristine — not just to give you workouts or routines or food tips, but to walk you through this part of the process.
The real part.
The emotional part.
The piece no one else talks about — the discomfort that keeps you stuck, and the tools to finally move through it.
So if this conversation is stirring something in you — if you’re ready to stop standing still and start building trust with yourself again — come join me. You don’t have to do it alone.
In the meantime, take out a piece of paper today and really sit with these questions. Let yourself write freely. Go deep.
Where have I been trying to stay still?
What discomfort have I been avoiding?
Why does this change matter to me?
Who am I becoming when I choose growth on purpose?
Because when you change how you view discomfort,
you change what you’re capable of.
That’s the shift. That’s the real work.
And I promise you — it’s worth it.
If you have questions about the program, or just want to talk more about this, send me a note anytime at
[email protected]. I love hearing from you.
I’ll see you next Tuesday.
