Episode Transcript
Are you tired of feeling like every meal, every workout, and every decision is
a high-stakes battle? Do you keep thinking that if you just had more
willpower, everything would magically fall into place? In this game-changing
episode, we’re blowing the lid off the myth of willpower and uncovering why
changing your eating and exercise habits doesn’t have to feel so ridiculously
hard.
Hey everyone! Welcome back to The Arm Coach Podcast, episode 39. I want
to let you all know there is still time to grab my Armed For The Holidays
program where I give you all the tools and resources you need to stay on
track with your nutrition and fitness—even with all the holiday craziness.
This program is designed to help you feel empowered instead of burnt out
and overwhelmed this holiday season! Be sure to grab the program at a super
discounted price in the podcast description of this episode.
Today we’re diving into a topic that I know is going to shake things up: Why
changing your eating and exercise habits doesn’t have to be so hard.
Yes, you heard me right. Changing your habits—those deeply ingrained
behaviors that feel like they’ve been etched into your DNA—doesn’t have to
be a monumental, miserable struggle. If that makes you raise an eyebrow,
good. Because what we’re talking about today is going to challenge some of
the most common advice out there.
We’re going to expose the myth of “willpower,” tear down the notion that
you have to suffer to succeed, and get real about why most people are making
this way harder than it needs to be. And if you’ve ever found yourself stuck
in the cycle of dieting, over-exercising, or beating yourself up, this episode is
for you.
Alright, let’s get real for a second. Why does changing your habits—whether
it’s eating better, working out more, or stopping that late-night snack attack—
feel so ridiculously hard?
Here’s why: you’re focusing on the wrong thing. Most of us approach every
situation—every meal, every party, every weekend—like it’s this new battle
we have to fight.
You know the drill:
• “How do I handle dinner out with friends when the menu is full of fried
food and cocktails?”
• “What do I do at that holiday party with the cookie table staring me
down?”
• “How am I supposed to resist the snacks at the office when someone
always brings donuts?”
• “What happens if I miss my workout this week because my schedule is
insane?”
It’s exhausting, right? Because it feels like you’re playing defense all the
time. You’re constantly reacting to what life throws at you, scrambling to
make decisions in the moment, and feeling like every choice is this high-
stakes test you have to pass.
The truth is, it’s not the situations that are the problem. It’s that you don’t
have a solid foundation to fall back on. Without that foundation, every new
situation feels like a test you’re terrified to fail.
For example, imagine you’re trying to eat healthier but haven’t built the habit
of listening to your hunger signals yet. So every time you’re at a restaurant,
you’re paralyzed by the menu:
• “Should I order the salad even though I don’t really want it?”
• “What if I get the pasta and regret it later?”
• “Am I going to blow everything I’ve worked for if I share dessert?”
Without a strong foundation, every meal out becomes a mental tug-of-war.
Or let’s talk about exercise. If you haven’t built the habit of showing up
consistently, every busy week feels like a make-or-break situation:
• “If I skip my workouts this week, am I just going to give up
altogether?”
• “Is missing one session going to ruin my progress?”
• “What’s even the point of working out when I don’t see results fast
enough?”
And don’t even get me started on social events. Without a plan or mindset
you can trust, parties can feel like landmines:
• “I already had one drink. Should I just give up and eat the appetizers
too?”
• “Why is everyone else eating whatever they want while I have to ‘be
good’?”
Here’s the kicker: when you don’t have a strong foundation—a clear plan,
consistent habits, and a way to manage your mind—every situation feels like
an uphill battle. But when you do have that foundation, everything changes.
With a solid foundation:
• You don’t panic at restaurants because you know how to eat for your
body, not your fears.
• You don’t spiral when you miss one workout because you’ve built
consistency over time, not perfection.
• You don’t spend social events second-guessing every decision because
you’ve learned how to trust yourself.
Instead of playing defense, you’re finally on offense. You’re in control—not
the cookies, not the menu, not the skipped workout, not the donuts in the
office kitchen.
This isn’t about being perfect. It’s about building habits so strong and a
mindset so solid that no situation can shake you. It’s about stepping out of the
constant struggle and into a life where you can finally breathe. That’s what
separates people who are constantly battling their habits from the ones who
just live them.
Okay, here’s where I’m going to get a little spicy: Willpower is overrated.
You’ve probably been told your whole life that you just need more willpower.
“If you just wanted it bad enough, you’d stick to the plan.” Sound familiar?
But let me tell you something: willpower is like trying to run your phone on
5% battery. Sure, you can make a quick call or check a text, but eventually,
it’s going to die on you—and usually at the worst possible time.
Here’s the real deal: You don’t need more willpower. You need to learn how
to manage your mind.
Think about it: willpower is a short-term solution. It might get you through a
night out where you avoid the breadbasket or push through one workout
when you’re tired. But what happens when you’ve had a long, stressful day
and there’s ice cream in the freezer? Or when your alarm goes off at 5 AM
and your bed feels like the coziest place on Earth? That’s when willpower
checks out and you’re left thinking, “Why can’t I just stick with this?”
The problem isn’t that you’re weak. It’s that you’re relying on a finite
resource instead of building something sustainable. That’s where managing
your mind comes in.
When you know how to manage your thoughts—like those sneaky little
voices that say, “I’m too tired,” or “I’ll just start tomorrow,” or “I’ve already
messed up, so what’s the point?”—everything changes. Instead of being at
the mercy of those thoughts, you learn how to step back, call them out, and
replace them with something better.
For example:
• When your brain says, “I’m too tired to work out,” you remind
yourself, “I’ll feel more energized after I move, even if it’s just for 10
minutes.”
• When it whispers, “I’ve already had a cookie, so I might as well eat the
whole bag,” you catch it and say, “One cookie doesn’t mean I’ve blown
anything. I can still make choices that feel good for me.”
• When it shouts, “You’ll never stick with this,” you challenge it: “I’ve
shown up before, and I can show up again. One moment doesn’t define
me.”
And here’s the magic: when you start building that mental strength in one
area, like fitness, toning your arms, it starts to bleed into everything else.
You’ll start thinking, “If I can push through a tough workout, why can’t I
tackle that project at work? Or have that hard conversation I’ve been
avoiding?”
Maybe you’ve been procrastinating on a big goal, like starting your own
business, and suddenly you realize, “If I can carve out 20 minutes a day for
my arms, I can carve out 20 minutes a day to work on my dream.”
Or maybe you’ve been putting off setting boundaries with someone in your
life. Now, because you’ve built up the confidence to push through a
challenging workout, you think, “If I can get stronger physically, I can get
stronger emotionally too. I can handle this.”
This isn’t just about your arms, ladies. This is about creating a life you’re
proud of, starting with the way you show up for yourself. Toning your arms is
just the first step, the proof that you can stick with something, push through
challenges, and create the results you want. Once you see that power in one
area, you realize it’s been in you all along.
So no, you don’t need more willpower. What you need is to train your brain
like you’re training your body—one rep, one thought, one choice at a time.
And when you do, watch how it transforms everything.
Alright, let’s get into the good stuff: The five foundational skills that make
healthy habits feel like second nature. These are the building blocks. Forget
the situational stuff—this is the real game-changer.
1. Listen to Your Body Signals
This is a biggie. Your body is constantly sending you signals—when you’re
hungry, when you’re full—but we’ve gotten really good at ignoring them.
Here’s a quick experiment: Next time you eat, ask yourself, “Am I eating
because I’m actually hungry, or because I’m bored, stressed, or just because
it’s ‘time to eat’?” Learning to tune in to your body changes everything.
2. Stop Judging Yourself
Look, you’re human. You’re going to slip up. The problem isn’t the slip—it’s
the spiral that happens after.
“Ugh, I messed up again. I’ll never get this right. Why do I even bother?”
Sound familiar?
Let’s stop that nonsense. Slipping up doesn’t mean you’ve failed. It means
you’re learning.
3. Watch Your Mind
Here’s a fun fact: Your thoughts create your feelings, and your feelings drive
your actions. So if you’re stuck in a loop of negative self-talk, it’s no wonder
you’re feeling unmotivated.
Start paying attention to what’s going on upstairs. If your brain is feeding you
a steady diet of “This is too hard” or “I can’t do this,” call it out.
4. Manage Your Thoughts
Once you see what’s happening in your mind, you can start to change it. This
is where the magic happens. You don’t need to suppress your emotions with
food or distractions. You can actually work through them.
5. Take Care of Yourself Now
Not later. Not when you’ve lost 10 pounds or hit some goal. Right now. Treat
yourself like someone you love.When you do this—when you show yourself
kindness and care—food and TV stops being a Band-Aid.
So what happens to you when you develop and cultivate and grow
these foundational skills, instead of focusing on the situation?
Nothing scares you. No event, no feeling, no person, no situation. You
can be anywhere. You can do anything. You can be with anyone and
you're not worried about how it's going to affect your behavior.
Because your overall thoughts are, ‘I'm good. I'm okay in this
moment. I'm working on this. I'm doing my best. If anyone can do
this, then I can too’.
So what's the takeaway from your coaching session today?
I want you to think about building your foundation. Don’t worry about
situations, because when you have the foundation, there is no
situation you can't handle. You're not hanging by a thread. You are
not one slip away from losing whatever you've learned. You're
growing step by step.
Your Arms Are Just the Beginning (5 minutes)
Kristine:
Let’s zoom out for a second. Toning your arms is amazing—it’s empowering,
it’s visible proof of the work you’re doing—but it’s not the endgame.
When you learn how to manage your thoughts around fitness, it unlocks
something so much bigger. You realize that the same tools you’re using to
show up for your workouts, to push through self-doubt, to make better
choices, can apply to every area of your life.
Your relationships. Your career. Your big dreams.
Toning your arms becomes this incredible symbol of what you’re capable of.
It’s the proof that you can create anything you want, starting with your body.
The First Step (5 minutes)
Kristine:
So, where do you start? Pick one foundational skill to focus on this week.
Maybe it’s listening to your body signals. Maybe it’s watching your thoughts.
Start small. Master one thing at a time. Build that confidence. And before you
know it, this won’t feel like work anymore. It’ll just be who you are.
Alright, that’s it for today! Remember, you don’t need more willpower. You
need a foundation. And once you have that, there’s no situation you can’t
handle.
I’d love to hear what foundational skill you’re working on this week. Send
me a message, leave a comment, and let’s keep this conversation going.
Oh, and if you’re ready to take things to the next level, check out my program
Arms by Kristine. We dive even deeper into all of this, and it’s an amazing
space to grow and connect.
Thank you for spending time with me today. Keep building that mindset,
keep toning those arms, and keep proving to yourself what’s possible. You’ve
got this!
Until next week, stay strong, stay focused, and keep living like the
powerhouse you are.
