038: The Hard Truth About Holiday 'Treats'

Ready to challenge the holiday ‘treat’ mentality and keep your goals intact? In today’s episode, we’re getting real about the ways we justify overeating and skipping workouts as “treats” – especially during the holidays. We’ll dive into why we often feel that indulging means going overboard and how to redefine treats in a way that leaves us satisfied without the self-sabotage. "Hey everyone, welcome back to The Arm Coach Podcast, episode 38! If you're new here, welcome, and if you're one of my loyal listeners, thank you for coming back. Today, I’m about to stir the pot a little—so get ready for some tough love. But before we dive in I want to remind you of something special that will transform your holidays into a season of joy, health, and confidence. As we all know, the holiday season can be a whirlwind of festive treats and gatherings. But guess what? You can still enjoy all the fun without losing sight of your fitness goals! That’s why I created my program, Armed for the Holidays! In just three days, I’ll give you all the tools and resources you need to stay on track with your nutrition and fitness—even with all the holiday hustle and bustle. Whether you're in your 40s, 50s, 60s, or beyond, this program is designed just for you, to help you feel empowered instead of burnt out and overwhelmed this holiday season! If this sounds like you, you can grab the program at a super discounted price in the podcast description of this episode. We're going to talk about how to sculpt your arms AND have treats without sabotaging your goals. Yes, I said treats. But here's the truth: most of us are doing it all wrong. I’m going to say some things that might feel a bit uncomfortable— maybe even a little tough to hear. But, trust me, it’s all coming from a place of wanting you to feel your best and step into the new year feeling proud of the choices you made, rather than feeling like you have to start all over again. Are you with me? So first let's talk a little bit about treats and what treats are, because we all love them. We all want them. We all give them to ourselves, whether it's consciously or unconsciously. And you might remember, if you've listened to me before, we’ve talked about how we classify foods. Foods that are treats. Foods that are more helpful in our regular eating plan. And I want you to remember that we talked about foods that are not good or bad, we talked about foods that are helpful, and those that are less helpful to you. Foods that are less helpful to you can still have a place in your life. Listen, we’ve been conditioned to think that food has a moral value— good or bad, healthy or unhealthy. Well, I'm here to tell you, it's a lie. Stop labeling food as good or bad, because it only fuels the guilt and shame spiral when you eat something you consider "forbidden." And you know what happens when you tell yourself you can't have something? You want it more. It’s like telling a kid not to touch the cookie jar—it’s all they can think about. So I don't want you to think, good or bad in terms of the food, and I don't think it's really helpful to think of healthy or unhealthy and make it very black and white. You know which foods are good for you, which foods give you energy, which foods make you healthy, which foods just generally make you feel great, and make it easy for you to get to and maintain your weight and muscle mass. But there are going to be some foods that are really helpful that you'll have most of the time. And then there will be some foods that are a little bit less helpful. So those we're going to consider treat foods. I'm sure that you want food sometimes, not for its nutritional value, for low carb, high fiber, low sugar. Sometimes you just want food for pleasure, right? Because it just tastes good, and you want to use it as a way to give yourself a very quick, easy to get, pleasure in your life. Maybe this food has no real big nutritional value. And that's okay. But it gives you pleasure, it gives you enjoyment. I really think it's okay for you to do that. Let me give it to you straight: You are not bad because you eat cookies. And you're certainly not bad because you enjoy some pie. But here's where you’re getting it wrong—you link eating treat foods with eating massive amounts. And that, my friends, is where you destroy your trust in yourself. So, let’s break this down. When you decide to indulge in something like cookies or pie, what happens? You tell yourself, “I’m having a treat, so I might as well go all in.” And that is the real problem. This all-or-nothing thinking leads to overeating, frustration, and self-loathing. Then you wonder why you're not seeing results, and you feel like you're out of control. Think about this: You’re at a holiday gathering, and there’s a beautiful spread of desserts. You see something you love—maybe it’s your favorite pie or those rich, decadent cookies. And here’s the moment where we tend to go, “It’s the holidays, I deserve to enjoy myself,” and we grab a little bit of everything. But let’s break that down. Are you actually enjoying yourself when you’re eating to the point of discomfort? Are you really treating yourself when you know that afterward, you’re going to feel bloated, sluggish, and maybe even a little guilty? That’s not a treat. That’s actually a pretty rough punishment. And here’s where the real controversy comes in: You don’t deserve to stuff yourself with food. You deserve to listen to your body, respect it, and enjoy food as part of a balanced life. Treats should be about quality, not quantity. If you choose to have dessert, fine, but do it on your terms, not on your brain’s terms. Here’s the truth: Treat foods are meant to be enjoyed—not demolished. If you want the pleasure of that cookie, enjoy it in moderation. And I’m talking about real moderation—not stuffing yourself because it's ‘forbidden’ food. The more you eat, the less pleasure you’ll get from it. You know that feeling when you eat past the point of satisfaction and suddenly, it tastes like cardboard? That’s because you’ve hit your limit. Your pleasure stops there. And I’m going to challenge you to see this pattern for what it is. This whole “holiday free-for-all” mindset? It’s a habit. It’s conditioning. And guess what? It doesn’t have to control you. You can still enjoy those delicious holiday treats without piling your plate to the brim. It’s all about making a choice that honors what you want right now and what you want long-term. And guess what? Your mind is a liar. It will always want more, even when your body is done. That’s the game it plays—because food gives us instant pleasure, so your brain thinks it should never stop. But your body? Your body has a limit. And it’s time you start listening to it. Say you’re going to a holiday party, and you know there’ll be an incredible dessert table. Decide ahead of time what you’ll have, and really enjoy that piece. But here’s the twist—let that be enough. Enjoy it slowly, savor every bite, and really make it count. But then, make the choice to stop before you feel stuffed. That’s the key difference: it’s the difference between choosing enjoyment and choosing regret. Now, I want to bring this back to ownership. You know, a lot of us have this habit of treating food as a reward, almost like we’re kids again. But we’re not kids. We’re grown women with the power to make our own choices, and that means it’s time to own up to what we’re really doing. If we’re telling ourselves that we “deserve” a treat every time we’re stressed or every time we’re celebrating, then maybe it’s time to question whether that’s actually treating ourselves—or if it’s just an easy way to avoid dealing with our emotions. And what about exercise? This might be a tough pill to swallow, but I’m going to say it: Skipping your workout isn’t self-care. It’s not a reward. Now, don’t get me wrong —rest is important, and sometimes our bodies need a break. But skipping workouts because “it’s the holidays” or because “I don’t feel like it” is actually a form of self-neglect. Think about it. What makes you feel better: the satisfaction of a workout or the guilt of putting it off? Let me give you a little scenario. Imagine it’s a chilly December morning, and you had a late night out at a holiday party. You’re cozy in bed, and the last thing you want to do is get up and exercise. The temptation is there, whispering, “You worked hard all week; just stay in bed. You deserve a break.” And maybe that’s true—maybe your body genuinely needs rest. But if we’re honest, how many times is that really the case? Most of the time, that voice is just trying to take the easy way out. And when you listen to it over and over, it starts to build a pattern of inconsistency. Let’s face it: nobody gets results by skipping workouts every time it feels a little tough. And come January, do you really want to feel like you’re starting from scratch? Or would you rather be able to say, “I showed up for myself, even when it was hard”? Now, don’t get me wrong. I’m not here to tell you that you can’t have holiday treats or that you need to go full steam on your workouts every single day. I’m just saying that it’s time to get clear about what we really mean when we say “treat ourselves.” Treating yourself isn’t about indulgence without limits. It’s about honoring your goals, respecting your body, and making choices that make you feel proud of yourself. And you know what? Sometimes, that means saying no to the extra cookie. Sometimes, it means getting up and moving even when you don’t feel like it. So here’s a little exercise I want you to try over the next few weeks. Whenever you’re about to make a choice—whether it’s about food, exercise, or even how you’re spending your time—I want you to pause and ask yourself, “Is this really serving me?” Am I making this choice because it aligns with my goals, or am I just looking for an easy way out? Because here’s the truth, beautiful: You deserve more than an easy way out. You deserve the satisfaction that comes from showing up for yourself. And if you’re thinking, “But it’s so hard to stay on track this time of year,” trust me, I get it. But it’s not impossible. This is about building a relationship with yourself where you don’t rely on food to bring you joy or rely on excuses to avoid what you know is best for you. It’s about owning every choice you make, knowing that you’re the one in charge. I want you to feel empowered, not deprived. And yes, that might mean rethinking what you consider a treat. It might mean realizing that a treat doesn’t have to be a plate of cookies or skipping the gym—it can be a choice that leaves you feeling energized, aligned, and proud. So, as we go into this holiday season, here’s my challenge for you: Let’s start redefining what it means to treat yourself. Instead of reaching for the cookies every time you need comfort, ask yourself what you really need. Is it food, or is it a little self-care in another way? Is skipping a workout really what you need, or would showing up for yourself feel even better? Listen, you’re not alone in this. We’re in this together, and I’m here cheering you on. And when January rolls around, I want you to feel proud of the choices you made. I want you to look back and know that you didn’t let December be an excuse to give up on your goals. You honored yourself every step of the way, and that, my beautiful friend, is the real treat.